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Can also read my posts at Mumbaikar.com and filmi features @ Bollyspice.com


No man's land..literally!

Disclaimer: Like always not a work of fiction, but dedicated to the men in my life (well, atleast a few of them). You make me stronger, & without you my life is incomplete.
ok, so while the hooplah continued, every article, tweet & other random medium of communications used these days ranted about "Women's Day", how it is important, & enlivening to have another "day" added to our calender of celebrations (the real purpose of the day actually drowning in commercialization). The ones that were doubly enthusiastic were spa owners, malls who seized this to bait the victims. Sadly, here the victims were men, who had no choice but to go along with the hysteria, or be tagged as "discriminating" or "callous".


Because we all have been at some point in life.
"Inspired from a short movie i came across with the same name"..

If i could go back in time, if only i could rewind,
i see it now in my subconscious mind
Having said, right things wrong,
or maybe it was the other way round.
I should have tried, why didn't i?
i should have lied, why hadn't i ..
should have let u known, while i could,
now here i am, forlorn and mis-under-stood.
masked emotions, i longed for you to see
clandestine words, i wished you would read
wanted to stop you, drown bitterness from your words
just this once, i begged you would trust me.
It was supposed to be a joke, no harm meant
called after you, dying to explain
you blocked me out, i tried real hard
damn! misunderstood all over again!
so ill try once more, not counting the deeds i do
hustling my way to please & indulge you 
and although my intents are all sincere and good
Alas! in vain i am still MISUNDERSTOOD!

If you're happy & you know..

Ok, so our lives might not be perfect. & time & again we might be whining about heartbreaks to nagging spouses to crappy pays to evil bosses. but if you think back, there have been incredible moments and if you live it right they can be yours forever.
Before you read ahead, i want you to know, this isn't a piece of fiction. These are true instances which i have heard, seen or been in, courtesy ppl who make up my life.. so read on at your own leisure and then let me know abt your thought or two -
You know LIFE IS GREAT when,
. You sip a cup of coffee whilst enjoying the sunrise or sunset or maybe..both,
. Your parents don't frown when u demand icecream for breakfast. They know you've been working hard.
. You wake up to atleast 3 msg's wishing you a good day.
. You work 3 days a week, get paid for 7. no-one on either sides is complaining.
. Six figure isn't just on paper, its in your bank account as well.
. Companies are filing for bankruptcy, everyone's screaming recession, yet you get dividend just when your next bill is due. (god is truly listening!!)
. Your bank is swept clean, but you have over-eager friends prancing around to bail you.
. Blackberry is ur new phone.(for everyone else in ur circle, its still a fruit) **jealous**
. You ditch your best friend's plan for a date. She's thrilled to hear from you the next day.
. When you say "small gathering" for ur bday, its more like a packed theatre. & they aren't there for the free booze but bcoz they truly luv u.
. You're on bed rest with minor sprain, but ur family+friends barge in with food, flowers & ideas to keep you entertained.
. You're all messed up! ur friend hauls you for a fab haircut. U walk out feeling like a diva.
. Your friend's ranting about her horrific day, but you're gushing abt ur date last nite. She doesnt mind. she is more happy for u.
. You moan bitterly abt ur daily commute to work..few days later ur office has a new address - 5 mins down ur road.
. Your sister books you on an all-paid holiday (without parents!!!). you didnt hav to beg for it, its not even ur bdayy!!!
. Its past midnite, hell of a day. Car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. Your friends dont run off, rather join u in appalling singing whilst waiting for backup.
. You break glasses, spill wine..but the restaurant staff isn't fuming. You're their regular.
. To you - Breakfast in bed means snuggling with ur loved one & gorging on continental food, not sipping your maid's paani-cum chai because you're down with temperature.
. Your friend is in love with an amazing guy from work, they thank you for playing cupid.
. You have money to splurge on that gorgeous D&G bag, on a whim, without recalculating budget
. You're friends are having horrid nightmares having had to listen to you for months rant about ur bad luck, forces being against you, everyone hating you, etc etc..but you can be sure, when you dial them at any hr, you will hear a concerned voice.  "Life truly is great".

He proposes, She disposes.

"Fineee! Have it your way!! she cursed - the washing machine, the universe but more so Amey. She was hopeless with technology & knew it too well. But when Amey resorted to sarcasm about her tech-ways, the feminist in Nisha stood up to the challenge. But that was 1hr earlier & now all she wanted was to pour the soap water on his head, while he stood behind her & snickered.

When Nisha joined Rising Media, her colleague Amey, had come across as an arrogant, self indulgent, obsessed, snob. A year later, her views about him had unsurprisingly remained unchanged. What added to her ferocity was watching him flirt endlessly with every fair specie in the vicinity. 
At 5'7" Nisha was a picture straight out of cosmo. Flawless skin, hazel eyes coupled with subtleness complimented Amey's boyish charm & unmatched wit. According to anyone who saw them together they were a poster couple, but Amey's flamboyance, eager, over the top persona was in complete contrast to Nisha's - grounded, composed nature.

"Can i help you with that?" he asked watching her battle with the scanner her first week at work. She refused curtly. He stood & gaped till 15 mins later, she put the power on. He smirked, as the papers fell out in order.
"Let me get that for you!", he offered when he saw her juggling the files on her way out the door.."No!" she exclaimed..Crashh!! the files scattered all over.
"Let me do it." he hinted, while she toiled on opening the car door that had jammed. "Thanks, ill manage", came her reply.."turn the key a lil harder", he prompted..After a 10 min wrestle, the door yanked open. he sighed and walked away.

And thus began the routine, time & again. He offered, she refused. just like that.
Today, multiple instances & 2yrs later, Amey eyed his wife admirably. He wanted to help her, but her strong spirit was the reason he had fallen in love with her in the first place. His heart leapt, as he saw a glow of pride on her face at her small feat. He would lend a hand someday but not as yet. For now, he would stand behind protectively, as always.
Nisha glanced at her husband from the corner of her eye, and knew her lil struggle was worthwhile when she saw the ardor in his eyes. She would have loved to have Amey bail her out..but not as yet. For now, their routine would just be this way.

He would offer, she would refuse.

Life, Love and a dollop of Faith...!

She woke up with a start; heard confused noises in her head. Reached for the bedside clock. 5:01 am, the red digits stared back at her. S***! another hr before the alarm goes off. Maya, 25-yrs, the epitome of the independent urban woman, whose life encircled around her family and her job but most importantly Abhay.

They had been together for 2yrs but it felt like a new start everyday. Maya loved the surprises, the little notes left in the most unexpected places around the flat, the bouquet in the middle of a random day, the sms before she was to step into a meeting and the congratulations call almost immediately after she stepped out. & Abhay... well Abhay just loved Maya.

The floor felt cold against her bare feet. She looked at her reflection in the mirror. Pale, lines showing obvious signs of stress. The past months had been rough, events had transpired had shattered her. She reached out for the book on the coffee table and pulled out a single sheet. She didnt flinch upon reading it - she knew the contents by heart. 

"I miss u my darling... our fights, our laughs, our talks, our dates, .. i miss u coz without u there is no US.. & i miss "US"!" A lump formed in her throat. The writing was recognizable but the words were blur. Blurred from tears - not hers, but the man who had written it. Abhay had penned the note the day they had fought, their first and last big fight..they did argue after that, but made up promptly & more passionately.
The alarm shrieked. 6:00am. She got up and worked through her routine. packed a quick lunch, made way to the bus-stop. The conductor smiled warmly as he gave her the ticket. After-all she had been his regular for the past 3 months. She got off as the bus halted outside the hospital. She walked slowly, never having the ability to face what she dreaded hearing everyday. Abhay had been in an accident. He had slipped into coma 3 months back. No-one knew if he would ever make it. No-one ever dared to tell Maya either.

Something didn't feel apt today. The normally silent room was buzzing with activity. She froze at the door. The doctor was by the bedside checking his pulse. Maya turned away not wanting to confront reality. A light tap on her shoulder jolted her. She turned to face the doctor. She searched his face for clues but he just took her hand and led her inside. Tears rolled down her face, her heart burned, and her head throbbed with the exhaustion. She reached the bedside before her legs gave away. 

Abhay lay there listless, a weak smile on his lips. Maya sank into a chair in a state of trance. She took his hand in hers & whimpered, "You're back.." Abhay looked at her, twinkle in his eyes and whispered softly, "I had to my darling... I missed "US"".

Life, one step at a time.

Walking on the cold winter sand, taking every wave in her stride
She stopped to look around, she checked her watch for time..
she was in no hurry, she had no place to go
nothing made any sense, it didn't matter anymore.

Life had come a full circle, she knew she had failed
She felt let down, she wanted it all to go away
She looked up, hurled curses at the sky..
not knowing what had gone wrong..all she did was cry.

Sitting on a solitary rock, with no one by her side,
she felt a shiver run through her, images kept coming back to her mind.
she looked upto God, questioning him everytime,
what reason did he have, to just let her life go wasted by..

The sun was setting, the sky turning into an orange shade
She gazed, her eyes shone, as her tears began to fade.
Her mind felt lighter, heart began to soar
thinking, wondering she got up & strolled the shore..

Taking in every sight of bliss around, her heart skipped a beat
God whispered.. i give you the best gift, now go out there and live some more
she rubbed her hands and then her face, with a heavy sigh
& as she prepared for the day ahead, gave God her bravest smile.

Karan Affairs - "10 Things we hate about us"

I adore you Mr Johar & ur films too , & recently I have so much as become a fan of your writing. Coz in all its simplicity it captures the eloquent & safely tread essence of u and all that encompasses ur world. .. so after reading your latest article, i'd like to add a 11th point to the same and hopefully ur in complete accord with me...

So here goes - To the b-town (& noone in particular) - Your fans adore you, thus a lil reciprocation of their love in some form is highly appreciated. Announcing on public forum that you are to be attending XYZ event & then (upon seeing the crowd) masking behind your aviators & ray-bans or your 6ft guards is totally uncool. Stop, smile, wave - if you have an extra second .. sign some autographs.. pose for a pic or two! We may not guarantee your next BO hit, but u sure have our vote for Mr/Ms congeniality!!

P:S since im late, & ur next column is out, just wanted to express that this one just didnt do the magic as before... how abt this for next time..ur take on ppl coming to mumbai with b-town dreams in their eyes..!!! "TICKET TO B-WOOD"

Note: This is in response to Karan Johar's column on itimes. Please click to read the column.

What has the world come to?

Met a friend over the weekend, she was ecstatic about her new job & wanted to celebrate. While we reveled in our own tune and clinked glasses of wine, she exclaimed, "I love it when my friends are jealous of my success, but wont show it because they love me too much!".. At that point, although i was aware of her inebriated state, somewhere in my sub-conscious mind i knew it was true. sad but true. Hence this article, things that wont faze u! (albeit it might hav if u were in the 1950's).

1. 45-yr old saying "i might not live to see that day!" when discussing her 50th bday plan! (yeah u can never be sure)
2. french kiss on prime-time indian television (Yash Raj episode of Mahi-way, once but twice!!)
3. First qs upon meeting a friend after ages, "who are u doing these days?" (not "how", "WHO!")
4. We dont talk anymore - she was my best friend and then we fell in love with the same guy.
5. We called it off, we don't love each other anymore.
6. Street vendor who is as old (or older) as you, screaming, "arre Auntyyy!!" .... wtf?
7. Im bored, i need to change my job. (after last job change 3 months ago)
8. Free bag of sugar for 2000 rs of shopping! duhh ..
9. Yes Ma'am it is absolutely free!! ............... psst *conditions applied*
10. Go for a haircut. You want junior, senior or star stylist? It'll cost you around 3k ONLY.
11. Put on an Ambani clan face, barge into a cab like you own it. He'll say "nahi jaane ka hai", you quietly get out.
13. Guy to his male friend - oh dont worry, she is having her "those days". thts y the mood swings..
14. Arre thoda shift karo (make room for one more when 4 are already seated in a bench for 3)
15. No i dont care about the stupid fridge, i was saving for my precious Jimmy choos.
16. my office canteen is my second home.. serves me lunch , dinner.. sometimes breakfast also,
17. ohh plsssss its not that late! .. ill be home in another hr or so .. (after reaching home - oh s***, the milkman already came & went)

& my fav - SMS: Call! Need to speak urgently (15 mins after u walk out of CCD having had coffee with the same person)

*sigh* but it is true, we are consumed by this to insanity and nothing is too much!
Pls feel free to add to my list. Im sure there are many more life's experiences have taught us!!

How old are you anyways?

So the newspapers & every alternate channel are debating on whether Sachin Tendulkar should be given the prestigious "Bharat Ratna". The facet that caught my attention here was that - the row was not whether he deserved it or not (everyone seemed to agree he deserved), but "whether he was of the correct age" to be bestowed the honour! Ironic huh?

So while our media, aam junta and the so-called torch bearers squabbled unreasonably on the topic, our man himself in all humility declared that he didnt care much for the award! His prize lay in the undying ardor his fans had and his zeal for the game. Such is the sad state of Indian sports.

To conclude then: please keep the Bharat Ratna above politics.

The first.. & many more to come (hopefully)

Being a freebird (read:unemployed) has its perks.. spending too much time on the internet, reading random blogs & being a decent writer myself, I gave in to the art of blogging eventually!

Sitting aloof, with a cup of tea for company and trying to sound all intellectual, I try to put my random thoughts into words. It isn't tough especially if u paid any attention to english class in school, but it does take a lot of guts to put what you feel out there for the world to read.

So i am going to try & attempt to write here regularly, and if my writing is too cheesy, mundane and unbearable to read, please move on and find yourself another blog to read. i won't mind. no hard feelings. truly.


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